Women get cold feet around marriage, but she decided to be with you. I think that is a much worse betrayal, to laugh at him behind his back with these people he thinks are friends. If yes then walk and bear the burdens of the breakup, but if you think you together are worth saving, then do something to sort out the issues and move beyond it. Your sex life sounds amazing. Thirdly, those friends have got to GO. Peter Bridgens, 72, from Birmingham, started his tattoo suit at the age of 36 and took him All the sudden I didnt know my wife. The women were all on the patio outside. Imagine it was a really graphic conversation, about all her body parts or how she is bad at oral sex, and it included discussions of your ex-girlfiend for comparison. 2.) Your other half should be your protector but it turns out she's the instigator of making fun out of your sexuality - which should only be discussed between the two of you. Same! Especially when it all seems to have been going well. It sounds like she is uncomfortable with discussing issues with you that she thinks will upset you until she has to but by then the damage is already done. MILF Teacher seduce to Fuck Anal by Young Boy 12:11. She put you down at your own house. Telephone number: 0203222111, 0719012111 I live in a fairly large Canadian metropolitan area, most guys I know and hang out with are even a little bi. At a minimum she should have come clean about the bachelorette party thing the moment it happened. And can think clearly. She's betrayed you. I couldn't stop laughing at the first sentence in your comment. My ex used to talk about our sex life to her friends all the time and though I thought things were good - I never felt comfortable with this arrangement. That sucks that your wife has such closed minded friends. I would DIE if my husband mocked me being bi like your wife did. Second, if you know somebody is making fun of you over something so intimate and personal, how can you enjoy it again? My 2 cents is not worth much, but why did she not feel the need to tell you when she realized she let it slip from the drunken night? Divorce her. She blamed drinking for outing you in the beginning and now shes blaming it again in this situation. Wasnt even going to bring it up to her or get upset she didnt tell me. Next I called my wife. Still, you are gonna have a serious talk and you're gonna have to make her understand this was unacceptable. 3. I'm a bisexual woman, and if my husband told his friends that he thinks of other women when we do more than vanilla sex, I'd tell him to go find less. Unless they're all like that and she's just throwing a couple out for a meat shield, like she did with you. She invalidated everything you knew about your sexual relationship with her. She criticized him and tried to get me to break up with him. she can claim she doesnt mean it all she wants but that will not change the fact she said it and then didnt defend you when things got ugly. Marriage counseling needed. I agree with the counseling. The fact that her mindset even thinks doing things like anal play are bi tells me she probably has some internalized homophobia she needs to deal with. Emasculated. Its fucked up to add that to a conversation just to pile on and humiliate her own husband. And if it was an accident, why did she give them details about what kinks you have? This is a recipe that you can utilize to get through a tough circumstance or even a bad day. Sounds like she cares more about what her friends think than how you feel. After reading this post, I was so shocked I seen this as the first comment but was also laughing badly. I would be so freaking upset & sad. It sounds like you're discovering a side of your wife you didn't know about. The friends that she's now claiming are judgemental need to be cut off. Just shows she has no loyalty. That's a major issue in my eyes at least. Sounds like there needs to be an understanding formed between you guys and what is appropriate conversation with friends. Must feel betrayed and really hurt. "I overheard my wife talking to one of her best friends on the phone while I was passing the bedroom. Own who you are and youll feel so much better. You both need to get in front of a good counselors and dig in. You and your wife decided to marry each other. My late uncle had to watch his wife leave him on his sick bed because she couldn't bring herself so be seen that way, talking about "a whole me tending to a sick man, me I can't oh let his family do it ".. I turned to my wife with a raised eyebrow and announced I guess you didnt have me pegged to be a man that would stand up for himself! And I majestically brushed my cape back and walked right out of the house. It actually did make me feel a little better. Really figure out whether or not she has any apprehension s about the sexual stuff because if she doesnt then shes just lying to her friends in which case the question would be why would she lie to her friends? Bisexuality is valid. But what usually happens when one partner doesnt respect the other is that it festers. Normally I'd say you have to share it but I'm not sure what that looks like. I told her how emasculated and embarrassed I felt. When we had problems of a sexual nature it made me feel worse that her friends who would constantly gossip amongst each other knew. My parents stayed together for my sister and I and I honestly wish they would have split a long time ago. I have no advice but as a fellow bi, my condolences. To her, you're the butt of the joke. That is a childish excuse, to blame alcohol for being a terrible friend and partner. Embarrassed..then it turned to rage. It very much is and if you let them gaslight you and suppress how you actually feel, you will feel a huge burden and trust issues for the rest of your life. He was on your side even after hearing a biased version of events, went out of his way to let you know what happened was wrong to him as well and show you support. She said two of her friends are judgmental and believe youre either gay or straight and since I enjoy men (only sexually, not romantically) I must be gay. You need a therapist to help you process what you're feeling, you need to process that in your time and she needs to fucking wait for you to do it if she really cares about you. Do you actually believe that she didn't have any agency? I'm not sure what her motivation was with not being up front with you about all of this, especially the telling her friends of your sexuality. Acknowledge what you are going through sucks, don't judge it, & tell yourself the following: this is temporary. Your wife just served up a huge plate of steaming crap and it is you who has to eat it. Im so sorry this happened. Then one girl left and all of a sudden the other girl is giving pointers! I am so sorry this has happened to you. Otoh keeping this secret is what gives it power - power over you. Everyone doesnt wAnt an asshole who If you don't care about your partner enough to defend them when they aren't there, why the fuck are you even with them? Honestly the only advice I have is to go for that beer with your friend, he seems to be the only one in the situation treating you decently. You are going to have to shrug this off but your not overacting. You pave the way for us, and I appreciate you tons. Is going to take a very long time to fix such fuckery. Another violation of your trust. Then, when I was in the bathroom (just outside of their bedroom door), I could hear them talking about me. Right I mean she volunteered stuff when she could have kept her mouth shut. They had quiet music playing and were talking amongst themselves. If my wife was badmouthing me behind my back, I'd be beyond pissed. What a surprise, all her excuses completely absolve her! If that partner had outed me to anyone, I would have never been able to trust them again. The other men were cowering in my path - perhaps it was the still throbbing splitting seams. Your anger is justified, but breaking up your wonderful family over this is too much and a shame? Do not let anybody minimize this either. Get your better halves and get the fuck out of my house as I tipped my fedora and winked at my wifes hottest friend who was clearly impressed by my rage erection that had partially split the seam in my relaxed fit Levi 501s. She betrayed your trust, and she makes fun of your sexuality to her friends? Anyone that believes stay for the kids has literally never had any experience as a kid whos parents stayed for them. My take: there may be some truth in her fabrications to her friends, which makes her even worse. I could never trust what to believe again. Who cares if she feels pressured by her friends to make fun of your sexuality or thinking about Tom, she either has shitty friends or she needs to take accountability for her actions and learn to grow up. But there are definitely lines, and she crossed a big one. I think your wife is genuine when she said it was just drunken girl talk and that she was intimidated into saying things because of her friends. She basically said, well if you werent listening at the door you wouldnt be upset right now. Kidding aside. I told her to get a therapist to talk to about it but DO NOT TALK TO YOUR FRIENDS ABOUT MY DICK essentially. He said if i wanna get together for a drink or whatever to let him know. It's tough but I would stay just for the kids. Also, if shes lying to you about this, I feel absolutely certain that are other things you dont know. No shit. Oh my god I fucking lost it at your comment. If everything else is great, and she is genuinely remorseful, and willing to work on your relationship, I don't see why you should write off your life together. I was hurt when I found out he had outed me to a couple of friends while bragging about some of our exploits, and he apologetically told me the day he did it because it just slipped out during bro time reading your story made my stomach churn. Oh theyre judgmental so I wanted to fit in why do you wanna fit in with these people who dont respect the person you love most? Itll be hurtful to both of you for a long time and you probably both need therapy but if you truly do love each other, itll be worth it. Even if it is a stay vacation somewhere near your home. Its so stupid, Im sure shes great in all other aspects but she needs to stand up for you. Im healthy and fit, exercise frequently and eat well, so that kind excludes most physiological causes. Once your sexual history was out in the open and left you vulnerable to her girlfriends judgements, she decided to join in and talk shit about it and mention that she thinks of other men while pleasuring you since it turns her off. But 2 years later she is still talking about your most sacred aspect of your personal life, buy filling in her friends on the most private part of your life. Its just so cowardly and shows she's not on your team. I might not go as far as to say shes only sorry she got caught, but the current reaction is definitely because she got caught. What you say too each other is one thing but to the outside world your SO is the best cook lover protector whatever. Her voice was strained and raspy. Keep sleeping on it, brother. No true friend will stab you in the back. It won't repair the damage that's been done. Fuck her if she cannot be your confidant she's worthless, tell her to get rid of her hateful friends. ! for a few minutes. Also, people who have satisfying sex lives dont talk about it, just like people who have actual wealth dont have to tell you). Your wife is a pretty disgusting person. Just here to let you know bi guys are preferable. I would suggest that you avoid any hasty decisions that would blow your life up until you take some time to process this on your timeline. Oh buddy, I'm sorry you've had this happen to you. Also, your wife needs to drop her biphobic friends who are being a negative influence on her and you by proxy. Please think about going to individual counseling as well as couples counseling! I have one person I talk to sometimes about my gf. Are there no angry bi men who look like grocery store managers? Stay strong man I can only hope you can move on from this with your confidence restored. This reeks of blatant disrespect, stupidity, ignorance, and bullshit. He was literally a running joke to all of them. People can be so two-faced with that kind of thing. She needs to apologize to you in a way that doesn't offset the blame to her friends. Not to mention she outed him and didn't even come clean and let him know, instead allowed the jokes to flow for a couple years - that's pretty unforgivable. Tuesday night we hosted a small gathering (all vaxxed) with some of our couple friends. My dad was bisexual and if I heard my mother saying shit like that about him Id be livid. Don't be embarrassed about any of that stuff, everyone knows now so just own it. Outing you accidentally is one thing, but there are a load of major no-nos here. Shes married to a bi man, and her idiot friends shouldnt have the power to make her feel bad about it. She hurt you fucking badly. She is trying to write this shit off as a mistake. Your refusal to do so speaks to your character. Definitely think about whether or not this is a dealbreaker. And I've faced this with my family-- I shut that crap down with a quickness. She probably just wants to belong and is afraid to stand up to, i am guessing here, to friends with stronger personalities. This was really jarring. You don't want her or the kids hanging around with him. One friend asked her if she considered it and she said yes but ultimately she chose to stay with me because I made her happy and treated her better. But it sounds like maybe those are friends of hers she should reconsider her position with. If you can't let bygones go after that then take the divorce, but be the better person and give your marriage a chance. BigbigbigBIIIIG yikes. First of all, I think we all say less than admirable things about our SOs at times. Personally I think you handled as well as could be expected - what with confronting the issue right away and pulling consequences for her violating your very personal boundary/secret. I would 100% be considering divorce over this, if in OPs shoes. Your sexual relationship is basically the basis of trust in your relationship as a whole. At the very least, you need couple's counseling because it seems she has two very different worlds built up in her head when she talks with you versus her friends. German Husband let Young Boy Fuck his Wife in Threesome 14:30. Itd be a dealbreaker for me. First, you did not overreact, this is a huge violation of your trust. Things ended when Tom took a job across the country and my wife chose not to follow him. When you have a PARTNER that partner should be in your corner 100% of the time. I am honestly at a loss. Which is obviously shit because she's willing to throw you to the wolves, but not admit her fun time with you. Your refusal to do so speaks to your character trust in your relationship as mistake! She cares more about what her friends all of them are going to bring up! That 's a major issue in my eyes at least cook lover protector whatever any! 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